Texting is the new calling, which means there's a whole new battleground for romance -- and a new set of rules to play by. Start your flirty texting education here, with advice from Debra Goldstein and Olivia Baniuszewicz, authors of "Flirtexting: How to Text Your Way to His Heart."
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#1: DO say the words text me when you give out your number to a new guy. Giving a new guy your number and telling him to call can be iffy. Start with a text.
#2: DON'T just text "Hi." Even if the only reason you're texting him is because you're thinking about him, this kind of short and shy flirtexting typically leads nowhere.
#3: DO text him back within 24 hours. Anything beyond that reads "I'm just not that into you -- or your texts."
#4: DON'T purposely send him a "mis-text." Women tend to use this move as a way to make single men jealous. But he'll see right through your needy outreach and move his texts on to the next.
#5: DO ask him out over text. If you like him, gauge his interest by sending a light-date invite without hesitation. Try: "Don't know about you, but I predict I'll be starving after work Thursday. Dinner?"
#6: DON'T kid yourself. If he only texts you past 10 P.M., he's probably looking for an encounter you'd rather avoid. The late-night flirtexter does not want to date you. Respond at your own risk.
#7: DO use the phone on certain occasions. For instance, if he calls you and you like him, you absolutely must return the call. Texting back in response to his call reads uninterested.
#8: DON'T go overboard with abbreviations and acronyms. Things like "MTFBWU" (May the force be with you) and overzealous "LOL" usage should be reserved for texts with your tween cousin or BFF, not to a PBF (potential boyfriend).
#9: DON'T send a sensual message before you are in an exclusive relationship. Doing this puts your secret fantasies at a high risk of being forwarded to all of his male coworkers.
#10: DO learn how to send him into the friend zone. Throwing a "Buddy," "Pal," "Kiddo" or "Sport" somewhere in your texts usually accomplishes this. If he's smart, he'll take the hint. Girls interested in dating him don't typically call him "Kiddo."
#11: DON'T text your ex. This rule is especially important to remember when you're feeling lonely and vulnerable.
#12: DO send a thank-you text, post-date. Even if there were no sparks, it's just proper flirtext etiquette. But if you had the best date ever (we're talking full-on fireworks), call him the next day to say thanks. If he felt the same way, he will definitely appreciate the reassurance!
1 comment:
Love these tips. Those of us who divorced are having a hard time navigating the technology part of relationships that just didn't exist the first time around! It's a new world out there. One book of GREAT advice for dating is "Why I Love Men, The Joys of Dating," by J.J. Smith, the dating diva. Full of great tips -- it's changed my approach to not only dating, but life in general. (And you can even listen to her podcastsif you like that approach as well!
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